There are some days that I feel like everything is just fine.  Some days that I feel completely overwhelmed.  Some days I even feel discouraged, but today is a little different.

Today I feel victorious….  I feel that no matter how gloomy, or uncertain my future could ever be, I am able to overcome.   Today I realize that I am created for a time and a purpose.  Today I recognize that I am to achieve that purpose.   I am to glorify my creator. 

Today,  I will love others unconditionally,  I will cherish the blessings given to me such as my family and friends.  I will share Gods genuine, unfailling love with those who have no clue what love really is. 

Today I will cause my Father God to smile,  Today I will step out in faith and recognize that I don’t have to be perfect, and I don’t have to have all the answers.  I just have to put my faith in Christ and be me!

I was just viewing a video by a person who has turned to atheism after a very bad church experience.  It saddened me to view what the person had to say for multiple reasons.  What hit closest to home is that I have had very similar experiences in church.  I am nowhere close to perfect, and I do not speak in judgement, but I would like to shine some light on a couple of things for those of us “Christians” that actually claim to be such. 

It greatly saddens me whenever I find out that a restaurant owner hates Sundays because the “church” people that come to their restaurant are so hateful, disrespectful, ungrateful, and hard to please that ”It will make you cuss”(according to the owner).  It hurts me to see people turn away from Christ because the “Christians” are turning them away by their attitudes, disposition, and condemnation.  I am disturbed by these reports because I can say that I have been there. 

I personally have been beaten so far down by supposed Christians.  I’ve had scripture used against me, been told that I should not be transparent and that I am destroying those around me.  I choose however to check out what God has to say rather than people.  There are 2 thoughts that I would like to leave you with. 

1. If you claim to be a Christian…. are you pleasing to God?
2. If you have been hurt by a “Christian”…  Are you blaming God for the person?

Within the past couple of years I have began to catch a glimpse of what “True” christianity is.  I have been amazed at how much religious garbage I have had deposited in me that has prevented me from having a close relationship with God.  Only in true humility can we come to Christ, but so often we quickly judge others.  The problem is there is no way to judge others when we are genuinely humble.  Humility negates pride!  Love through humility is what Christ wants us to display. 

Get religion out, and let Christ in!!!  If we will catch just a glimpse of that, this world would be radically blessed by Christ!

          Todays culture and society tells us that porn is okay.  The common phrase “look but don’t touch” has become such a lifestyle that even touching is not taboo anymore.    No matter what society says, the Word of God is very clear about the viewing of pornography.   What amazes me is how tight of a grip porn can have on a person.  For years I thought that I could just stop viewing porn whenever I wanted.  That at any point I could make up my mind that it was the last time.  After many attempts of stopping porn, I finally realized an important key.    Freedom is something that I cannot attain on my own.  The only way to obtain true freedom is through Jesus Christ! 

A couple of weeks ago Rachel and I were interviewed for a video at RockChurch.  We opened up for the first time in a public arena about the struggle our marriage went through because of my addiction to pornography.  As difficult as it should have been, the process was easy.  I believe that God’s hand was in it from the very beginning.  Since the Sunday morning that our video aired, I have had the opportunity to help others.  Apparently our transparency is working.

        I say to you with great joy that there have been trials, temptations, and battles…..   In each of them, the victory is greater and greater.  Tomorrow I will embark in a new Bible Study called “Freedom Journey“.  A friend of mine will be starting this with me, and we together will go on an adventure with Christ toward meaningful relationships, mercy, facing our fears, engaging in spiritual warfare and finding ulimate freedom.  I ask that you pray for us as we begin this journey.  If you have struggled with some of these issues, I welcome you to join us.  All of the documentation is online at porn-free.org.

Here are the top ten reasons that I love my life.

1. I am blessed beyond measure.
2. I have an amazing wife
3. My kids can make me go from upset to laughing in seconds
4. I go to an awesome church
5. I now have a building that I can work in
6. I have the engine/transmission to put in my Jeep
7. I am enjoying School and learning
8. I know that God has been and is preparing me for something amazing
9. My schedule is much more flexible than this time last year
10. I am able to enjoy the greatest years of my life with the ones that I love the most!

TOP SECRET

“Top Secret” It was so inspiring to open that envelope this past Sunday morning.  Here is the history why.  About five years ago Rachel and I were in a church service where a man came to us and told us something.  Milton Martin was the prophet that approached us.  He let us know that God was going to radically change our lives.  We left somewhat puzzled by that church service because he simply told us that we would recieve a life changing….envelope.  That’s it just an envelope.  (I know he was legitimate because he knew way too much about the people in the service that day, and a lady’s deaf ear was healed by God in that service.) 

I had no idea when my pastor started the series ”Crazy Love” that it would speak to me the way it has, nor did I know that it would be completed the way that it has.  This past Sunday morning several things were confirmed in my spirit about what God wants to do in my life and in my family.  But most of all, the envelope reassured me that God’s word is true.  He is faithful!  

The envelope actually had a mission and what was needed to complete it, (money) in it this past week.  Money that is to be spent on someone outside my family or church, just to say that Rock Church Loves!  I willingly accept this challenge, I accept my mission.  To go into my world and love.  Not in word only, but also in action.  It is my desire to show this world the love of Jesus Christ through my life.   I realized that not only has God given me a mission in life, but he has also given me the means to complete that mission.  I also realized that I am the only one that can complete it.  No one else can complete my mission. 

Pastors of Rock Church, Thank you!  Your obedience has brought life change!

  Its about 1:30 am and I am waiting for snow.  Supposedly it is going to snow in the southeast today during the “Winter Storm” that is brewing.  For some reason I am doubtful of any major catastrophe in our area due to the “Worst snow storm we’ve had in years!”
  Granted, If it snows 1/2 an inch it will be the worst snow storm that we’ve had in years.  At any rate for now I will bundle up, stay warm and hopefully be able to play in the snow with my kids tomorrow.  Jackson and Olivia will not know what to think of it.  Have fun making snowmen, or just sitting in the warmth (like most people with sense do…LOL)

I have not had much opportunity lately to blog.  I feel like I havent had much time for anything.  Maybe it is just an overload of holidays, work, school, family, and everything else.  In the blur of life around me I have finally had time to think about a few things.  Here are a few of my thoughts.

• Sure, I am getting laid off from work, but should I not consider that as an opportunity to achieve more?
• I have a couple of weeks off before Christmas….I am going to love that time with my family.
• How do I focus, and find what my next step is in my life?
• What is my life all about???

Today I viewed the story of a young man with muscular dystrophy.  He had attempted suicide multiple times without success.  Finally, his father told him to stop feeling sorry for himself.  Once he allowed that to sink in he began viewing this disease as a gift.  An opportunity! 

I then sat and read the accounts of several martyrs tonight.  Morbid? No.  A cause for a self exam?  Yes.

What is it all about?  My life, Spiritually, Mentally, Emotionally, in regard to my family, in dealing with my struggles…… everything….   What is it all about???  As of now this is what I do know!

1. It is about legacy…. Not of me, but of Christ.  A living display of the Master Creator that made you and I in His image. 
2. It is about my wife….  I can succeed at everything in life, becoming famous, wealthy, whatever….But if I fail at my commitment to my wife, then not only have I robbed myself and my wife, but also our children, (someday)grandchildren, friends and other family.
3. It is about my Children….  I can never do in my lifetime what they can in theirs.  It is a great responsibility to teach them that life is far greater than what they directly see.
4. Perspective….    I cannot possibly understand what my life is all about until I have the proper perspective.

What will be next in my life?  I have no clue….. 

What is it all about??   That is becoming more and more clear.  I want to be the guy in the picture that.. whenever others see me, they see Christ living in me!

Who do you look like?

One last thing..  In China, November of 2000; 450 churches were blown up, and destroyed.  The statement made by the wife of Pastor Li (A pastor who was imprisoned more that fifteen times in 18 months) was this. “

“Don’t feel sorry for us, At least we are constantly reminded that we are in a spiritual war. We know for whom we are fighting. We know who the enemy is. And we are fighting. Perhaps we should pray for you Christians outside of China. In your leisure, in your affluence, in your freedom, sometimes you no longer realize that you are in spiritual warfare.”

Man, that certainly reminds me what it is all about!

Rachel and I have both prayed and thought intensely about the blog that we have been posting.  It is not her story, however, it is not my story either… It is indeed OUR story. 

I heard it said just today that because of this post our names are mud.  My reply was simply this,  “That is awesome!”   I rejoice because there is one very relevant truth.  When I decrease, He increases.  That is just the way God is, he allows our struggles to make us stronger.  When we overcome them and learn from our mistakes, he can then use us more mightily.  When we overcome pride and selfishness…. that is all just icing on the cake.  Check out the blog at www.rachelrowell.wordpress.com leave me some feedback.

For now, it is off to bed to get some rest and see what God has in store for tomorrow.  I will rest well knowing that my name is mud!

My wife just surprised the heck out of me!  So today I turned 27, and I get home from work, walk in and see Rachel and the kids.  Then she comes out of nowhere and says, “OK, open your presents”  Well….I’ve never gotten a birthday present…..muchless plurally.  She then says open the bottom one first.  I opened the best birthday present I believe that I have ever gotten.  Yep,  its really cool!!!…are you wondering what it is yet???  She got me a laptop, wireless router, and carrying case!!!  I am still stoked…I Believe this week is quickly going down in my history book as one of the best weeks ever  )

Babe, I love you,  Thank you so much for your generosity and thoughtfulness!

        A few weeks back a co-worker of mine handed me a piece of scrap paper.  He said to hold on to it and refer to it when I  was feeling down or burdened.  On this piece of paper it simply says “I am a man of God”.  I placed the paper into my notebook that I use at work, and really just forgot about it.   Yesterday, apparently the paper fell out.  A different co-worker approached me with the paper in hand and asked…”Is this yours?”  When I told her that it was, she said “I figured so, you’re the only one here that fits the bill”  I was so honored and humbled by that remark.  Especially so since that co-worker and I have not even spoken of faith in Christ or church or any of the typical “Christian” talk.  That has gone down as the greatest compliment I could recieve.     John 13:35 says “By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, that you have love for one another.”  What compliment do you want from others.    Be real and love life!